Dating secrets every women must know

Wendy wanted to know what men wanted. She wanted to understand why they stuck with some women and ran away from others. After interviewing 100 men for her book The Girlfriend Test, she had an epiphany.

Men can’t pinpoint what they want any better than women can, but whatever rules they have, they stick to them no matter what.

Unlike men, women tend to bend, budge and contort themselves to be liked and desired. It may work for a little while, but it’s not a sustainable way to be. Mainly because it’s fake.

“Whatever a man’s rule is, he’s really committed to it, and he owns it, and he’s looking for a woman to fit in with that,” said Wendy. “We should be more like men in that regard. Women need to stick to their guns.”

The most damaging thing we do as women is false advertising, Wendy says. Instead, we just need to be who we are and be proud of it. Be promiscuous or be selective or be asexual, but be what you are and don’t try to be anything else.

Of course, be safe, be healthy – physically and emotionally healthy – but make rules for yourself and stick to them.

“You have to look at some your issues and stop fantasizing about how things could be,” said Wendy. “You have to learn to be really clear about what you want and what is achievable, and to be able to communicate that in a kind way. Once you do that, you’re ready to start dating.”

MORE TIPS & TOOLS

A Good Dose of Wendy
Visit Dr. Wendy’s official web site for more insight on how to find yourself in a healthy, thriving, long-term relationship.

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Making it Work
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Love 101
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